Q: I want to go to fetish clubs and dress up, but I’m really shy. I don’t mind people in the club seeing me in my new Latex gear, but I’d be embarrassed if anyone else saw. Where should I put on my outfit? Is it OK to get changed at the club, or do you have to arrive in costume? I don’t want to look like an idiot!
S Harvey, Ipswich

Who said you’ll look like an idiot if you wear fetish clothes on the street? Leather, Latex, PVC, plastic... I mean, they’re only clothes. I’m not saying go to the shops in a ballgag or a gasmask, but I’m sure you can be your own judge. I once wore a see-through short dress to a park in my early 20s for a photoshoot. I don’t know what I was thinking; I didn’t even wear panties! I got away with it, but you might not. Personally, I prefer dressing up at home before going to fetish parties. It’s much more private and comfortable.

When I travel in big cities like London, I often have to take the Tube all dressed up. I get some looks and laughs here and there, but I ain’t dead because of that! The real inconvenience is, if it’s cold outside, Latex gets cold right away and you freeze to death. So put a warm sweater on top and you’ll be fine. Also, wearing regular clothes over your Latex is perfect if you want fewer eyes on you. Taking them off at a club is far easier than having to dress up. But if you chicken out and decide to wait to change at the venue, that’s still OK.

Most of the time, though, there’s no changing room, so you will have to dress in the toilets, squeezed in like sardines with all the other ‘scared of looking like an idiot wearing my Latex in public’ guests. But you’ll learn fast how it works in there: Keep your toes out of the way of stilettos and fight dirty to get a spot in front of the mirror! In the end, choose what you feel more secure with. I mean, deciding to live your fetish by going out to clubs, and not just dreaming about it, is already a huge accomplishment in itself!