Having a kidnap fetish sounds unlikely because, let’s face it, it’s the kind of scenario that makes a lot of people wake up in the middle of the night screaming.

But that’s not everyone, and there really, honestly is a certain type of person who gets wetter than an otter's shower curtain at the thought of being overpowered by flint-hearted thugs, bundled into a van and taken who knows where for god knows what.

Casual enthusiasts who want to be dragged off the street but later safely returned to their house can trawl the internet for a legitimate company (yes, they do exist). Hardcore devotees should probably reinvent themselves as some kind of contractor and head for Baghdad.

Anyway, I’ll shut up and let you look at how Sophie Howard might look if she was kidnapped and restrained by someone who forgot the handcuffs but brought a hell of a lot of rope.